On the eve of the future it’s customary to look back on the past with a fond/humorous/judge-y eye. It’s what we do. More importantly, it’s what we do with all we’ve accumulated that matters. And since we’re borderline hoarders over here, we’re keeping all the things! Sorta. Instead of the whole purge routine, we’re gonna stash away some of our favorite stuff in a HAM CAPSULE so that we can enjoy them forever. No fuss, no muss. How’s that for a 2016 resolution?
First and foremost, if there’s a soundtrack to 2015 (and this list), it’s Shamir’s debut album, Rachet. Vibrant and colorful, Shamir sashayed into our lives earlier this year and sprinkled us with fresh puns and youthful good cheer. Oh, and some sweet fish shorts. Set future vibes on MAX.
We didn’t actually try out our favorite beauty trend of the year, but there’s still time for the glitter hair part, goddammit! Sure, it kinda looks like a sparkly butt crack, but all that glitters ain’t gold, amiright? Plus, it’s such a Capital look that it’ll probably still be trending in 2116.
Whoever decided that we need to drop some lbs. after the big ball drops should be shot, but we’ve all seen WALL-E, so we get it. That’s why we’re tossing our favorite food of 2015 in the capsule, only to be resurrected when liposuction is available via the App Store. So it is with great affinity and the closed-eye crying face emoji that we say, “See ya next century, poutine!”
WOOF. Choosing the film of 2015 is a toughy, so we opted for the film about films. The Wolfpack is one of our favorite documentaries of the year. It follows the lives of six brothers trapped in a Lower East Side Manhattan apartment with a massive movie collection as the only window to the outside world. It’s sad, it’s brilliant, liberating, and uh, did you see the costumes they made out of old cereal boxes and yoga mats? Get Lifetime on the horn because CONGRATULATIONS! we have the winners of an entire season of unconventional challenges on Project Runway!
If we saw a lot of anything in 2015 it was clothing cores. It seemed like every week there was a new underground look. Don’t get us wrong, we crushed on most of ‘em -- normcore, babycore, hell, even bonnetcore. But the newest core craze is getting tossed in the capsule for an eternity longer. Clowncore is what stale popcorn-scented nightmares are made of and we want nothing to do with it. (After the club tonight.)
Happy New Year, y'all!